¿Qué es el shibari?
To quote our “Getting Started” page, Shibari, which means “to tie” in Japanese, refers to the art of tying someone in rope in a decorative or sensual way. This is done using specific techniques and knots. Another term you might see used for the practice is “kinbaku,” which means “tight binding”, or simply “rope bondage”
These techniques often create attractive or erotic patterns on the body, but it’s not always just about that. Although shibari is commonly practiced as a form of sexual exploration, some people find the process to be deeply relaxing or even meditative. They may also practice shibari purely as an art form. A term for this is or “kazarinawa”, which means “decorative ropes”. There are a wide variety of motivations when it comes to practicing rope bondage.
Which ties should you learn first?
Start out with what we call “Los 4 nudos fundamentales“. You have probably used these knots in your regular life without realizing that they are the basic components of hundreds of ties that are used in rope bondage. After you’ve mastered each of these basic knots, you are ready move on and tie a wide range of harnesses and patterns! Here is where we start people off:
One of the most frequently asked questions when people first develop an interest in rope is “how do I tie my partner’s wrists together?”. And while this is a very common tie in movies and TV shows, it is rarely done in a way that is sustainable or risk aware. After all, people who are tied up in the media are rarely tied by people who care about their long term health and wellbeing. Here at ElDucado.com, we care very much about your long term health and wellbeing, as well as the comfort of anyone you tie.
The Lark’s Head Double Column is fast and incredibly versatile! With just this one technique, you can do dozens of different types of scenes: Frog tie, Lamda, Ataduras para sillas, Crab Tie, etc.
The Lark’s Head Double Column, when applied correctly, distributes force across a wider surface area on your partner’s wrists, thereby reducing the pressure on all of the very important nerves, blood vessels, and bones in their wrists. Turn that Lark’s Head Double Column into a Load Bearing Lark’s Head Double Column and you’ve got a simple, low-risk wrist tie that your partner can pull on and struggle against to their heart’s content! Just make sure to teach them how to detect if anything is happening that should not be happening – for example, strange sensations like heat, cold or numbness; or sudden inability to flex fingers or hands as they normally do – and to report that to you immediately so you can fix the issue. There is always a risk of injury when playing with rope. Learn more about mitigating those risks aquí.
The Lark’s Head Single Column is almost exactly the same as the Lark’s Head Double Column up until the end when you lock it off (a.k.a., finish the tie). It allows you to put a secure cuff of rope around any one thing: A wrist, ankle, leg, waist, hip, chest … the list goes on!
Adding this expands the possibilities to hundreds of scenes!
- Wrists to head board
- Wrists out to the sides, tied to two upright posts or columns … ankles as well, if you like!
- Spread Eagle
- Flogging post
- Waist leash
The Shinju is the first chest harness we teach in our in-person Foundations of Rope Bondage classes because it uses the same principles used in the Lark’s Head Single Column, just applied to a different part of the body. In essence, the Shinju consists of two Single Columns tied around the chest at the base and top of the sternum followed by some vertical supporting straps to keep them in place.
A chest harness gives you a wonderful set of handles you can use to hold your partner. It also gives you something to connect to when adding additional ties. For example, you can tie their wrists in a Single or Double Column tie and then connect that wrist tie to the chest harness to further restrain them.
4. Crotch Rope/Cinturón de la Imposibilidad
If titillation is your goal, then the Unchastity Belt is for you! Much like the Shinju, a Crotch Rope (or Unchastity Belt as it is called on TheDuchy) is simply a Lark’s Head Single Column followed by a creative use of the remaining rope. Make your partner squirm by slowly and gently running the rope between their legs as part of a connective rope scene, or gruffly tie them into their belt and send them off to buy groceries!
The Unchastity Belt is a very simple hip harness which has a wide variety of modifications. Want a custom fit strap-on? No problem! Want to tie an insertable into your partner? This tie allows you to do either of those things … or both.
The Pentagram harness is a great beginner-friendly chest harness that leans more into the decorative side of shibari. After all, many people enjoy the aesthetic and stylistic appeal of rope as much as the restrictive qualities. Some even more so! Due to the high neckline of this tie, it is also a good opportunity to practice communicating with your rope partner about placement and tension on sensitive parts of their body like their neck and shoulders.
Depending on which variant you choose (variant 1 y variant 2), rope could end up quite close to the collarbones, which can be uncomfortable after a few minutes. This harness is worth practicing a few times before using for a photoshoot or event to ensure you have the proper fit for your rope bottom, whether it is yourself or another person.
How to learn rope bondage as a beginner?
Practice practice practice! In our rope classes, we like to encourage rope Tops and bottoms alike to learn the basics of rigging and to practice on themselves. Your body can give you immediate feedback about how the ropes are laying, whether the tension is even, and if a knot is digging in uncomfortably. Most importantly, usted will always be around when you want to practice! While there is nothing quite as instructive as tying on another person, tying on your own legs or waist can be helpful when learning new patterns and frictions.
How to get better at Shibari?
- As a rope Top, seek out both new and experienced rope bottoms to work with. In my experience, the times I have tied with someone who has a lot of experience being in rope have been some of the most transformative for me as a Top. People who understand how they like rope to feel on their body, can communicate clearly with you as the Top, and have worked with many other rope Tops are a treasure trove of experience, information and learning opportunities. It can be easy to talk yourself out of approaching an experienced rope bunny as a new rope Top, but try to remember that every expert was once a beginner. And rope people are usually very happy to nerd out about their thoughts and experiences with Shibari. Here are a few icebreakers you might find helpful:
- I’m new to rigging and I really admire your ability to [insert something you admire about them here]. Do you have a moment to talk to me about how you got to the point where you can do that so well?
- Your rope skills are so impressive and I’m a little intimidated by your awesomeness to be honest. When did you start tying?
- Not everyone who has super cool rope skills will have the time, bandwidth, or interest in walking you through the basics, but they may be able to point you to someone who does. Plus, they may be a new friend for you to talk to about rope as you grow your skills. Seeking friendship and community is always worth doing. If you are unsure of where to start in trying to find real-life practitioners near you, we have an article on that too!